Rants for a Monday

I have decided to start a new fund. I haven't quite decided what I am going to call it yet. Open for ideas!

Here's my plan. Get people to donate money to cover myself and my co-workers for those days when we just can't take it anymore. When we have to say what is truly on our minds. When our filter button is malfunctioning. When we forget to mute!

Just once I would like to be able to say what is really on my mind when people call with some of their complaints.
Your four year old child is out of control? Smack his behind. Do you really need that officer to come over and tell him off for you? What is going to happen when he is a preteen or teen and bigger than you? Yikes. Be the parent.

Your neighbour looked at you 'funny'? Toughen up, buttercup. Maybe he wasn't even looking at you at all. Maybe he is having a bad day and just has that expression because he is in some kind of personal agony. Maybe his life sucks, too. Maybe you aren't the centre of the universe!

Mom and Dad won't let you go to that party? Perhaps instead of pitching a fit and throwing items around the house you should stop and consider that they love you and may, just may, be trying to protect you and keep you safe.

You want to run a store but not have to deal with the kids who come in to BUY, yes, buy things. Sure they hang around. Sure they may sometimes steal from you. But not all kids are rotten. They are not all thieves. They are not all destructive. I worked in enough convenience stores to know if you treat them like human beings they usually act like human beings. If you don't want them around open an adult store. End of issue.

Tired of the vandalism and mischief in your neighbourhood? First of all call the police when you see something happening. Have a description handy. Know which way they went (and saying down there doesn't help).Don't wait four days and then call and accuse the officers of being lazy, useless, donut eating......well you get the idea.

Understand that when you want to report something, almost anything, we need to send an officer to take a report. We cannot go to someone else and ask them to stop harassing you without telling them who you are. We cannot accuse someone of taking your stuff without a theft report, oh yeah, and some proof! You would not appreciate it if we came to your door and accused you of things you had not done, or things we could not prove. So why do you think it's okay for us to do to that to those you think have wronged you?

Know important pieces of information when you do make that phone call. Someone stole your car? We need the license plate, please.

You think you saw a wanted person. A name and description would be very helpful.

Your boyfriend just beat you up? Last name and age would be good.

You saw someone driving that you are sure was impaired? Some help please. Where? When? Any kind of info on the vehicle. Which way did it go? Anything on the driver? Even the smallest details are useful! Color, driver, how many in the car. Big car? Little car? Even a partial license plate will help.

Oh yeah. My personal favorite. When you call 911 and we ask you "Police, Fire or Ambulance?"
Don't answer "no". Don't say "this isn't really an emergency". Don't tell us you need a phone number. Don't call to put in a parking, noise, barking dog, my neighbour has more trash out than allowed type of complaint. Not life or death emergencies here. Not a crime in progress either.

Ok, enough ranting for today.

I am looking for suggestions for the name of my fund! Any good ones out there?